It starts with a tingling sensation of pain imbued in hurt, and made worse by the thought that you could just be a cry baby over reacting to “small things.”
So you stare at the ignored WhatsApp messages sent days ago after a century of non communication, which has now become sort of a norm. You do what you know how to do best, rationalize it and make excuses. It’s a human thing to do anyway… When we go through an unpleasant situation we try to water it down with flowery words, and beautiful quotes that are just skin deep.
So you make the excuses.
“C’mon maybe this person is just busy.” But you immediately remember that they’ve been posting online too. Again you remember the supposedly deep quote coined by millennials, “the fact that I post online doesn’t mean I’m available to chat.”
But you’re not necessarily requesting for a fire side chat spanning into hours. As much as that will be appreciated, the courtesy of being recognized and replied will do for now.
Yeah that’s possible, until another fellow tells you how they’ve been conversing with this person you’ve taken a course on quotes to rationalize and explain away being ignored by. So you’re left with the last quote in the box-“maybe you do not matter.”
At no point does being ignored feel good, friendship or not. Off course there’s an exception to folks who have signed a pact with, dense, in conducting their social affairs.
At this juncture, a lot of emotions are on the run way, walking six inches and demanding to be felt.
So how small is the idea that you might be loosing some one you consider a friend ?
Because for those of us who friendship is difficult to come by, when we finally get it , we take it so seriously that it meshes into our soul that when it looks like we about to/or lose it, a part of us dies.
No avenue of losing friendship comes easy. These skin deep quotes about relationships taking into cognizance our 21 century “busy” are cool, until you are at its receiving end.
Losing people is a conversation that is not trendy to engage. But have to recognise its place on the table of affairs. Because man is biologically wired to be social, and this is achieved through relationships fostered by fellow humans, the social lubricant for navigating through the peripheries of this tough world.
Attention, and communication are the of the ingredient that sustains the life of a relationship. However, along side understanding that this will not be 24/7 available (as understood by any right thinking person,) we must also follow that understanding with when we’ve gotten to the dead end because sadly, relationships were never exceptions to the maxim of “nothing lasts forever.”
Or maybe there wasn’t anything. Maybe it’s just what being played by technology feels like. It provides grounds for communication, and we do lots of conversing, so perhaps an illusion of a relationship was created.
Which ever case it is…..
You’ll assert your dignity by rising up, acknowledging this end, without loitering around and hurting yourself in more ways than can be explained, and take a walk.
P.s: this relates to a broader spectrum of relationships not limited to friendship only.
AA (Anonymous Author)